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The days and days of worrying hadtaken their toll on Lars, he'd had to be strong for his wife and hisfamily whilst he was also worried sick for his beautiful daughter whowas fighting for her own life but now she was recovering, he wouldallow himself a little emotion.When Lars had recovered enough he left the cubicle and bumped into anold man almost knocking him over."I'm so sorry sir I didn't see you, are you okay?" The old man smiledat Lars."I'm fine young man but you look like you've had some bad news?" Theold man took out a silk handkerchief and passed it to Lars whogratefully accepted it and started to clear the tears from his eyes."Thank you, it wasn't bad news sir, just relief. My daughter has beenvery ill you see." Oh I see and now she's recovering you have allowed yourself a littleemotion?" Lars nodded."Take my advice young man, holding strong emotions like grief orworry within yourself is self-destructive for they will grow like adisease." Thank you sir, I think you may be. The sun was setting and a full moon was just beginning to rise. I was walking on the beach, but not to enjoy the breeze or the view. I was debating with myself whether on not to swim out into the ocean until I was too tired to swim anymore and thus end it all. I'm told that if you aren't struggling against it, drowning is a rather quiet and peaceful death, but was death what I was seeking? "To be or not to be?" That was my question, but I didn't yet have an answer. I knew I was miserable in my life, but should I just end my miserable life or "take up arms against it."I had thought about ending it all before, but tonight was my final decision point. Either I ended it all tonight or I did something to turn my life around. Those were the only two options available to me. I had left everything but the swimsuit and T-shirt I was wearing at the apartment. I walked the two miles to the beach and as I walked out onto the sand, threw my sandals into the trash container next to the.
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